The Role of Your Healing
But remember, all of this as we talk about in every single video all of has to do with how healthy you are inside. Because if you’re healthy and you’ve worked on yourself, none of these things are going to work. You’ll understand all of this is about control.
You’ll be able to enforce boundaries, and you will be able to not even engage with this person. It won’t even be attractive for you to even be in a relationship with this person. You also won’t feel so incredibly hurt when this person does any of these things because you’ll know exactly what’s going on. So, you’ll have more control over yourself when they behave this way.
4. Fear and Guilt
Remember, the point of supply is to get something from you whether it’s attention, admiration, or control. So, number four is fear and guilt. They will use fear—things like if you have an abandonment wound, which chances are 99% of the time you’re going to. If you have a fear of rejection, if you don’t like standing up for yourself, you are going to be a person who could easily be manipulated. I can easily throw some guilt on you, and I’ll be able to control you.
How they do this is they manipulate the situation by kind of threatening you in these very subtle ways. Maybe they give you the silent treatment. Maybe they just threaten to leave. Maybe they push you away. Maybe they’re comparing you to other people. Maybe they make you feel like you’re replaceable. Maybe they make you feel like you’re the reason why they feel what they feel.
If you are wounded, you’re going to try harder. And that’s the control, and that’s the supply. Trying harder and doing more and giving more is a narcissistic supply because what you’re doing is you’re giving into the ego. You’re feeding into them through attention, through whatever it is that you’re giving them maybe it’s drama, maybe it’s the negativity, maybe it’s the going back and forth with them.
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