Number 1: They feel powerless when they fail to get you talking.
They need words coming out of your mouth, you to feel emotions, and you to keep reacting to what they do to you or what they say. They need you to let them puppeteer you, they need you to let them push your buttons. But once you stop all of that and you zip your lips, you go silent on them, that is when they go crazy.
They can’t stand it because they can’t read you, they cannot guess what’s going on and what you’re plotting against them. And the chatter they project onto you starts consuming them, which is why sometimes it can be extremely difficult to deal with a narcissist when going silent, when not giving them any responses whatsoever.
When you give them silence, they start feeling pressure in their chest, they start feeling shame all of a sudden, they can’t stand it and they start feeling like a failure. They’re the ones who are supposed to give you silent treatment, you can’t do that to them. No, they have to have the upper hand.
So when you stop reacting, when you give them your silence, that is when they actually lose and then they try other ways to regain control, they push you left, right, and center. But silence is what they can’t stand for, silence means the absence of emotions for them.
Number 2: They need to know what you’re cooking in your head.
What’s going on to be able to strategize against you? When you do not talk, when you do not send those long replies, they can’t read you emotionally, they can’t decide what to do next, whether to abandon you or not. What state are you in currently and how that can be weaponized against you?
For example, if you are trying your best to make this relationship work and you are trying to express your pain to them through those long messages and long emails, then now you are in a very raw state and they can breadcrumb you, they can tell you anything they want to regain your trust and fool you one more time. But when you do not respond, they’re the ones sending long messages and long emails only to accuse you of things you haven’t done.
Read More:
5 Narcissism Code Words You Need To Know
5 Tell Tale Signs Of Narcissistic Collapse
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