Number 4: “You’re mean.”
The moment you say this to a narcissist, they will immediately try to turn the situation around because narcissists love to portray themselves as the victim. If you tell them they’re mean based on what they’ve done, the narcissist constantly tries to mask their true appearance, always trying to pass themselves off as the good person, the best person.
They hate the idea of people around them thinking they’re the mean ones. They will do everything to make you look like the mean one. This is terrible for them because the narcissist has always sought to construct, not their personality, but their appearance, to make that appearance perfect in the eyes of the world. So if you tell them, “You’re mean,” you break, once again, their fantasy and the appearance they’ve created.
Number 5: “Stop playing the victim.”
This is terrible. You know narcissist likes to portray themselves as the victim. The moment you say this to them, you’re telling them, “I know you’re pretending.” You’re saying, “I’ve figured out your game.” The narcissist will hate this because, at that moment, they realize they’ve lost control. This is terrible for them. Again, with all these phrases, I’m not encouraging you to say them—it’s not a good idea.
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